Bacon Power: Helping you buy stuff that's cheap.

Always lured by the glitter of aluminum from the fluorescent casing of a vending machine, I decided to become a connoisseur of sorts and test drive the array of canned liquids they display. Here is the lowdown on how to spend your spare change for that 3 p.m. sugar rush...

A&W ROOT BEER

This fizzy concoction is not for the faint of heart. Although history claims this an American classic, its appeal is to the all-Australian male - with a title that embodies everything a true blue bloke would profess to enjoy. With its no nonsense packaging, this is the hardest of the soft drinks. If a neat scotch isn't on hand, and you've got a manly sized thirst ... this is the alpha-aluminum of the vending machine.

CALPICO CULTURED MILK DRINK - STRAWBERRY

Considering myself a worldly woman, I enjoy a bit of culture. This seemed an exotic choice - unusually blending fruit, fizz and milk. Intensely sweet, this is what I imagine it would taste like if you melted down a packet of berry starbursts and strained the juice. However, this is not the type of culture you can cellar ... after a day open in the fridge it's best tipped down the sink, and not as a compliment to your brioche for Sunday brunch.

POKKA ALOE V

If there were 'super soft drinks' akin to 'super foods' - this would be the star. Made with Aloe Vera juice, a plant extract known mostly for its many extraneous benefits, such as cooling your sunburn to aid a sexy tan and prevent a mass of reptilian like skin shedding... I discovered it's also allegedly the answer to all my internal issues. The Aloe Vera plant is packed full of vitamins and minerals, and is supposedly beneficial for detoxification and digestion when consumed. So if you are ever going to feel good about guzzling a sugar laden soft drink - this one is it. Not to mention it has aloe pieces that are like the surprise toy in your Frosted Flakes - not only do you get to drink nature's syrupy sweetness, you get to eat its gummy lollies too. SUPER.

POKKA MILK COFFEE

Cafe Au Lait ala can. This was the way to wake up when travelling in Japan, where everything comes as a letter-number combo from a machine. It was the double hit of sugar and caffeine conveniently available from your hostel's common room. Genius. Sure it might not stand up to the coffee snobbery of inner city circles as far as quality of bean, creme of milk, and other la di da poo poo. But it tastes pretty damn good. So if you're too late to leg it to your favourite local and wait for Alessandro to put a love heart in your latte ... or if you're short that extra 1.50 for the low fat soy, extra sprinkles pick me up you crave ... this is the way forward. It's just like iced coffee - except made on 10 of those UHT milks you get from hotel mini bars, and swirled with shitloads of sugar syrup.

YEO'S LYCHEE DRINK

In my experience Yeo's are to Pokka what Star Cola is to Coca-Cola. Though if you're going to Yeo, this is some of their better produce (steer clear of the Soy Bean Drink, aka 'Arse en la Can'). It's the juice of Lychees - canned. Tasty. Nuff said.

Let them eat cake...

By Lou Lou.

Growing up, I remember every birthday being celebrated with an elaborate cake from the Women’s Weekly book of Birthday cakes. Mum would slave away for an entire day to fulfil requests for piano cakes with chocolate keys, individually placing every jellybean onto ‘the cuckoo clock’ cake, and even once requiring the aid of a brick to support the back of the ‘candy store’ cake. My point here is, although the task of constructing such outré cakes was difficult, these birthdays were made memorable by the effort … and so began my quest to bring back the elaborate party cake.

I decided to put this in to practice for our friend Tristan’s going away party. To appreciate this cake you need a bit of background information on our friend Tristan and the parties that ensue when he is the host. Tristan’s interests include: trance dancing (the best I’ve seen), experimentation, tie dyed pants … and generally being crazy in the most awesome kind of way.

So it seemed only appropriate that on this night of his going away party to combine a cake that looks like a plane is taking off, with a tie dyed interior. I was hoping that being Tristan’s party would ensure that at least a few people would be in some kind of mind altered state and my cake would provide a heightened experience of, for lack of better phrasing, some serious trip outs. Although unfortunately this didn’t occur, the cake was a definite source of excitement and was remembered of the night long after the mess had been cleaned up.

To make a tie dyed cake yourself you will need:

-Vanilla cake mix

-Food colouring (at least 4 colours)

-4 x small bowls

-Cake tin

Basically make the cake batter as per instructions... separate into the four bowls... add a different colour to each bowl... and pour each separately into the cake tin to create rainbow layers. Booyah! And you are done. Happy travelling bakerinos!!

Love

Denim and DENIM

Nothing says classy like a Canadian suit...

Kickstart your Friday with awesomeness

Just a few months ago, all of us here in Melbourne were saddened by the news that one of it's veteran live music institutions, Collingwood's 'The Tote', was being closed down due to the harsh liquor licensing laws destroying the roots of our grunge music scene ... one built amongst streams of bundy and bourbon and fueled by the ashes of winny blues. The Tote in all honesty was pretty stank - thongs were not appropriate footwear for the venue and you could expect to leave wearing someone else's sweat (and maybe their pants ... i'm just saying). Though it was filthy in the best kind of way ... that is, the kind that you used to describe the air you got jumping from the swing seat back when you were a gappy toothed, dirty faced midget. And this is how we liked it, because it was everything that post-punk rock wanted to represent it - raw, unhinged, and definantly unapologetic for who it was.

The one good thing about tragedies such as this, however, is that people find ways to come together and make it right. From the rubble of the Tote's demise has risen a fire - sparking the urge for Melbournians to unite and pay creed to the abundance of local live acts that have been integral to our city's heritage.

One of tastiest of these tributes has come in the form of free lunch time gigs being held at
1000 Pound Bend bar in the city. That's right kids, FREE - your dancing needn't be inhibited the weight of all that train change in your long johns. Bought to you by the good folk at Australian music magazine and blog site Mess + Noise, the aptly titled 'Lunch Box' series is taking place monthly on a Friday at 1pm. The next treat on offer to us is the multi instrumental looping of one very talented lady known as 'Pikelet,' on the 11th of June. So get on down, support our excellent local produce, and most importantly, kick start your weekend early with some shoulder shuffling and beers. I know I will be.

AWESOME.

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For more info, check out the Mess + Noise wrap up...

Lunchbox series #4: Pikelet